Wednesday, December 20, 2006

water shortage concern

As I also posted here, I want to start questioning people “when we should worry with water shortage?”

My concern begin recently after the rainy seasons come, because in this seasons we can start to accumulate stock of water and conserve them before dry seasons take over. But, I don’t know why people only concerned with water shortage during dry seasons just like curative approach, instead of also concern during rainy seasons just like preventive approach.

Why those government people never think and act well?

the origin of bluetooth

Why I talk about this - bluetooth - technology? Well, recently I really crazy with it. I love being connected with several device without wire at all. I like to see less cable cross over my table or between my gadget. It's make life looks more clean and neat.

Many people curious with the origin of bluetooth, especially why it was named so. I've read an article titled "What is Bluetooth?". So, this is their short explanation about the original name of bluetooth.

"The name Bluetooth is derived from the cognomen of a 10th century king of Denmark, Harald Bluetooth. According to the inventors of the Bluetooth technology, Harald engaged in diplomacy which led warring parties to negotiate with each other, making Bluetooth a fitting name for their technology, which allows different devices to talk to each other. The name of the king in Danish was Harald Blåtand and the Bluetooth logo is based on the H and B runes."

for detail see wikipedia

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Happy Galungan

Rgveda V.51.5
Svasti pantham anu carema
surya candram asav iva,
punar dadata’ghnata
janatam sam gamemahi.

We will follow the path of the Truth,
Like the path of the Sun and the Moon,
We will side by side with the Munificent, the Devotion
And the Great Divine

Kami akan mengikuti jalan kebenaran,
Seperti jalannya matahari dan bulan,
Kami akan menyertai yang pemurah, yang
penyayang dan yang maha mengetahui

with the rain

Rain always makes me feel blue. Not because it take place of blue sky or create mud or even create floods and came along with thunder. Actually, rain makes me feel blue because it comes at all times in perfect moment especially downcast feeling.

Like this afternoon, the rain comes heavily after I’m being hit by big wave of mute and mistakes that – said – I’ve done. It comes right the way when so many things judged that I never done something right. Never! Then rain comes in sudden and saddened.

Its’ best friend, big and deafeningly thunder, passing by and shouting at me saying, “I’ve told you, you’re not up to it! I’ve told you!” And, even skies also support both of them by changing into, not dark and gloomy background; instead it shades grey smiling to blind me with the hope of flood of mud and debris on the street. After all, I can’t do nothing except waiting or let myself wet during walking through the totality of such atmosphere. Whatever I do, I’ve already trampled.

No one will understand situation of heavy water fallen from the firmament since instinctively human always run or hide away or cover the body to make them less soak up with wet. Traffic full of crowd of people and vehicles try so hard to keep away from brown muddy water. Umbrella intersects each other covered people’s panic head and cars and motorcycles jamming one by one blocking the flow of others. In such a classical exhilaration, should I joined and ruin the show??

The rain today has strike me down by something so intense but cold and mute. No one know what it is, even my flawed heart could not clearly explain what. One thing for sure, today’s rain, like ceaselessly before, has confirmed me again about the gloomy day of my entire soul.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Tahukah cara membunuh yang paling tenang dan kejam di dunia ini?

Bagiku, menunggu diam seribu bahasa tanpa senyum tanpa sapa apa pun jua. Itulah saat dimana aku sudah pasti mati. Bukan hanya mati secara fisik tapi juga mental dan jiwa. Jika mental dan jiwa tidak ada, untuk apa tubuh ada? Mati saja!!

Anda pasti berpikir, aku patut dikasihani. Anda tak perlu mengasihani seperti itu, setiap orang pasti akan mati. Hanya masalah cara saja, ada yang elegan, ada yang tidak elegan. Ada yang religius, ada yang di tengah kriminal. Kalau sudah mati, hanya si roh yang tahu apa yang sesungguhnya terjadi. Selebihnya sudah jelas, mati adalah mati!

Itu saja!

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Lebih mudah bertemu Allah ketimbang Presiden?

Jadi, Allah bisa disetarakan dengan Presiden. Atau dengan kata lain, Presiden kita adalah Allah… Adakah logika yang ganjil di sini? Jelas logikaku salah di sini, tapi logika sederhana itu kusimpulkan dari pernyataan seorang pemimpin organisasi agama untuk tingkat nasional. Pernyataan ini ada di sini, tepatnya di tanggal 3 November 2006 dengan headline yang berjudul: "Din: Lebih Mudah Bertemu Allah Ketimbang Presiden"

Menurutku, paling tidak ada 2 (dua) hal yang lumayan ganjil dari pernyataan seorang Ketua Umum salah satu organisasi agama terbesar di Indonesia ini yang tersebut di atas:

1. Mungkinkah membandingkan apel dengan semangka? Bukankah kita seharusnya membandingkan apel dengan apel? Dalam pernyataan di atas, jelas sekali bahwa dia membandingkan apel dengan langit.

2. Jika tidak ingin membandingkan, bisa dianggap bahwa hal tersebut untuk menunjukkan penyetaraan. Maka, apakah mungkin menyetarakan Presiden dengan Allah? Siapa yang harus menyesuaikan? Apakah Presiden naik derajat setara dengan Allah, atau Allah yang turun derajat setara dengan presiden? Asumsi, kita sudah sepakat kalau Allah adalah Maha Derajat-Nya. Kecuali anda berpendapat lain, seperti halnya Din tadi, Allah bisa dibandingkan dengan Presiden maka hal ini bolehlah dianggap tidak sahih.

Yang mungkin jadi miris adalah sebenarnya pernyataan tokoh tersebut mungkin semata-mata untuk menunjukkan betapa religius-nya beliau (apalagi beliau mengatasnamakan organisasi keagamaan). Padahal, menurutku, esensi persoalannya adalah kesibukan presiden yang sulit (atau tidak punya) meluangkan waktu untuk kunjungan/pertemuan. Bukan bermaksud membela sang presiden, tapi apakah memang seharusnya sangat mudah bertemu seorang presiden? Semudah kita bertemu ketua RT misalnya... Kalau begitu pilih saja ketua RT jadi presiden nanti.

Monday, October 16, 2006

makes poverty history

Whenever I read word of ‘poverty’, I always thinking about my country especially people who lives in the outer island of Java. When I knew about this event: International Day to Overcome Extreme Poverty on Oct.17, I also start to think and imagine what kind of ‘real action’ to eradicate poverty. There were so many programs and policies designed and implemented, but only few of them has been socialized and evaluated in serious way. In Indonesia, poor people are – definitely – becomes subject of politics only. Nothing more.

In my opinion, let’s start thinking and planning poverty eradication program in local basis approach. We should never ever try to think about national – top down policies again. Instead, try to find any ‘hidden capital’ in local community to empower the economic activities and then try to find out what “poverty” actually mean for people. “Local wisdom” on poverty are actually exist quite long time ago in old ancient Indonesia. However, these kinds of local capital were being wiped out and replace by simple solution like money transfer or pure charity. That’s why now many people preferred just to receive without wondering how long they have to receive from others.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

on my 30th year

Today is my 30th birthday and look what I've got. It's a beautiful watch from my lovely wife. Thank you, dear. I love you so much...

Another enlighten thing is ‘age does matter’. It seems that when you’re entering this number (read: age) everything would never be easy anymore. Maybe that’s one sign of maturity. I hope it’s not only a sign, in fact it’s a start of better future. Amien…

Monday, July 17, 2006

... for Pangandaran

A deep condolence and sympathize with my brothers and sisters in Pangandaran for the losses due to the tsunami...

Another tsunami, another earthquake, additional disaster still comes further. Is it true that nature actually trying to give us a sign?

Lord, please let not our compassion fatigue become reality. Give us strength to surrender our strength to your will with love and pure heart.

Monday, June 19, 2006

Summary (part 2)

Now, this story is about the preparation for returning back home to Indonesia. After my thesis defense, I confirmed return ticket to Indonesia on June 6th. Since this time is my return home for good, packing and cleaning the room is the main problem. For reading materials and class notes, I had sent them by post and it cost NOK 1,800. Quite expensive, but I do not care since I have no time to look for another way of sending them. Another thing is my books, it take two days for me to finalized how I can pack all of those books in my luggage combined with clothes and the rest (Note: there was excess luggage 8 kg for them that I found during check in at the Gardemoen airport. Gosh!).

Lastly, I want to say goodbye personally to everyone and friends during my stay in Norway. However, I feel so sad that I couldn’t manage to meet all of them.

Well, I manage to have my last badminton game with Vidar and Daniel. Both of them are my first Norwegian friends in GG Hallen and since then become my playing partner in Badminton. Takk for spilleren!

I manage to say goodbye with my very good friend from Nepal, Dadhi and Baikuntha. I manage to say goodbye in very short time with Torill (thank you for the “Sophie’s World” book gift and visit me in very last moment).

And, on the last hours, I manage to say goodbye and having “last lunch together” with my supervisor, Arild Angelsen, and several staff of the Department of Economics and Resource Management at UMB. I feel so bad that I couldn’t manage to say goodbye personally to my flat mate Thomas. Thank you for my other flat mate, Nils, who had drive me to the airport bus station with his car. It was really helpful.

Well, I am grateful that I have a really nice moment during my stay in Norway. I met a lot of good friends and great persons. You may see some of my picture from my first year of study in Norway here. It’s been a great experience also to learn about Norwegian culture and language. I really loved the Norwegian people way to behave in such ways of well-control and discipline. I also loved the Norwegian teachers behave in a really friendly ways. It was also lovely to know international community during my study in Norway.
Especially, I learn a lot about my brothers and sisters from Africa and South Asia. If I heard about their story about their countries conditions, I always grateful that Indonesia is having so much better (if you don’t want to say lucky) condition. In short, I only want to say that I learn a lot indeed.

Tusen takk Norge!

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Indonesia: Ring of Fire?

Indonesia is on the so-called Pacific "Ring of Fire," an arc of volcanoes and fault lines encircling the Pacific Basin”.

The above statement seems to be simply the words of press. It’s a jargon or perhaps a logo for a country called Indonesia. In academic field, perhaps in geology or geography, those words will attract some study or even big field research where some scientists or experts might involved.

I am not a geologist or geographer. I am just a citizen who realizes – based on the statement – that I lived above the ground that have great potential danger. However, I never being thought – at any educational occasion – about how to deal or even face directly with such danger, if they shown in immediate time.

Summary (part 1)

This is summary of everything happened in last few weeks:

Finally, I presented and defended my thesis on Thursday June 1st 2006, in front of my supervisor and one external examiner. It was take place for more or less one hour, started at 12.30 in the afternoon. After presentation for about 15 minutes (from 12 minutes that allocated), I received a lot of questions from the external examiner and two or three questions from my supervisor. Several important points that I had chance to make note on the questions I presented below:
  1. The main problem is on the understanding the statistical model used. In my study case, interpreting and presenting the results of logit regression model in a proper ways.
  2. What is the practical implication of my study?
  3. Expectedly, there is strong correlation between population density variable and regional variable, especially Java island variable. This issue was not yet clearly anticipated and controlled.
  4. Regarding unit of analysis: observably, there are more than one individual in one household that being analyzed. Thus, there is a big possibility of correlation among household member which not yet clearly anticipated and controlled in my regression model.

I had answered the above questions/problems as:

  1. Given the study that I did in my thesis, it was only an initial for further study in farm household theory. To continue improving the method and techniques, I need to learn more about another regression model or improvement of given model used by past studies.
  2. Regarding practical implication, I believe that my study have a general implication on the development of rural (farm) household potential in Indonesia. It is expected that by understanding the behavior of labor market in rural area in Indonesia will gives us hints for promoting any policies to improve economic condition in those area. Specifically, this study was not yet supplied or analyzed particular policies in Indonesia.
  3. I already suspected that the correlation between population density and Java island variable was exists. However, I still apply the two variables to represent impact of supply of labor (population density) and regional differences (by region/island). Due to time constraint, it is expected that those condition could be improve in future studies.
  4. About unit of analysis, my observation with the data found that there is a condition where each farm household have numerous member where they have activities not only in farm/agriculture but also non-farm/non-agriculture. Previous studies mostly used household head or farm operator and their spouse as unit of analysis, ignoring other household member. However, for Indonesia case that would not be able to capture the real situation of labor allocation within household in Indonesia. That is my main argument for using individual level as unit of analysis. Regarding the correlation among household members, definitely I need to control them. However, I could not found any literature with clear explanation of such condition particularly for topic off-farm work participation. Further improvement need to be done in the future.

Despite of all questions arise during the defense, my own note regarding my thesis is as follow:

  1. The data that I utilized, IFLS, has not yet being used optimally. The data contains plentiful information, but it is quite difficult to understand and to prepare the raw data to be able to use directly for analysis. Another self-study or training might be very beneficial to explore the benefit of IFLS data.
  2. The farm household model itself also still needs to explore further. From what I have found so far from various journals, the model has much potential to be used for different purposes. So, it is really beneficial to master this model indeed.


After the defense, I got a call from my best friend Paksi and he congratz me in here. Thank you very much, Bos! Looking forward to see you very soon. Well, that is all for now…

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Bulan separuh hinggap di malam tak begitu gelap
Siluet dedaun berayun ditiup oleh angin dingin
Sendiri sunyi sepi menghuni nurani

Rindu ini belum terbalas tapi sensasi pilu telah menerjang
Dibawa separuh bulan yang hilang
Dibalik gelap siluet dedaun yang berayun
Ditiup angin hari nan dingin

Lagu mendayu mengiring detik waktu
yang asyik menghitung masa
tapi melupa getaran hati yang tak tentu
diterpa nelangsa dikecup nestapa
apalagi jika sudah tak dipercaya

Bagai matahari panjang di belahan utara
Namun dingin kutub datang tetap jadi raja
Hangat di permukaan sekejap saja
Lalu membeku upaya segala selamanya

Saturday, June 03, 2006

malam ini menipu rasa
matahari masih menahan baranya
dilangit yang memerah jingga
tapi dingin dihembus ke dalam jiwa

matahari juga menipu cuaca
bersama awan seolah ceria
berlari-lari di sudut angkasa
namun tak terjangkau hasrat di sana

angin menyusup dari celah jendela
gigil sekujur kasih tak pernah bisa dipercaya
kau tetap gigih berkata-kata
bahwa aku lahir sejak pagi selalu mendusta
sehingga bahkan segala upaya
tak kan pernah bisa disapa berguna

harus ditempatkan dimana?
malam yang menipu rasa
dan matahari yang juga menipu cuaca

hanya kau yang terutama
buah pikir dan kecerdasanmu segala
secara ini hati ku bukan mulia
kedunguan sempurna aku si manusia

jangan mencoba menjawabnya
seperti ketika kau tetap gigih berkata-kata
aku tiada akan berdaya apa

Sunday, May 28, 2006


“Yang namanya mahasiswa telanjur dianggap cendekia. Keistimewaan mereka diduga berada pada kekuatan nalar dan kecerdasan intelektual. Sementara warga republik lain kembang kempis menanggung krisis ekonomi, mereka menikmati kemewahan bertahun-tahun mengolah ilmu di tempat terhormat yang tertutup bagi mayoritas warga negara seusia.”
Gosh! This article has alerted me very strong. I am also
a college student (baca: mahasiswa)… and I feel sorry.

Saturday, May 27, 2006

for Yogya...

A deep condolence and sympathize with my brothers and sisters in Yogyakarta for the losses due to the earthquake...

Friday, May 26, 2006

tentang maaf

Coba bacalah dengan seksama artikel di sini. Menarik sekali menemukan bahwa ternyata tutur bahasa Indonesia penuh dengan topeng seperti halnya individu-individu yang menggunakan bahasa tersebut. Makna dari penggunaan kata maaf pilihanku adalah sebagai berikut:
16. ’kalau mau urusan lancar…’ seperti dalam "Maaf. Pengertian dong. Uang rokoknya mana?"
Masih belum habis pikir, ternyata ada juga yang memperhatikan hal ini hingga sejauh demikian.

Thursday, May 25, 2006

statement of the day

This is my favorite statement from a reading that I've found today:
"There is nothing wrong and much right with letting religious faith be the wellspring of a citizen's public action. At the same time, one whose moral judgements are driven by religious devotion must be ever careful to discern whether God's word or human politics is doing the work. For there is a vast difference between a political inspiration that is fired by one's deepest religious beliefs and a claim of religious belief that is fired by a pre-existing political commitment. It is the job of the religiously devout citizen to understand and preserve this distinction, one that unfortunately is blurred, and perhaps disbelieved, by our political rhetoric, as well as by our mass media."
The Culture of Disbelief (1993) by Stephen Carter

After reading several comments and reviews on this book, it is hard for me not to agree with Carter. I just touch by this book as my 'positive protest' on so many religious-based law that already (or will be) inacted in Indonesia.

To be honest, I am worry... no doubt on that.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

I just wanna go home

(video klip click here)

by Michael Buble
Album: It's Time (2005)

Another summer day
Has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go home

Maybe surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel alone
I just wanna go home
Oh I miss you, you know

And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that

Another aeroplane
Another sunny place
I’m lucky I know
But I wanna go home
Mmmm, I’ve got to go home

Let me go home
I’m just too far from where you are
I wanna come home

And I feel just like I’m living someone else’s life
It’s like I just stepped outside
When everything was going right
And I know just why you could not
Come along with me
That this is not your dream
But you always believed in me

Another winter day has come
And gone away
In even Paris and Rome
And I wanna go home
Let me go home

And I’m surrounded by
A million people I
Still feel alone
Oh, let me go home
Oh, I miss you, you know

Let me go home
I’ve had my run
Baby, I’m done
I gotta go home
Let me go home
It will all be all right
I’ll be home tonight
I’m coming back home

*Gosh, I really miss you, my south-moon

Monday, May 22, 2006

a good lesson learn from European song contest

You may be wonder why I posted song lyrics of “Hard Rock Hallelujah” by Lordi in my previous post. Definitely, it was not a tremendous song (not yet perhaps) and Lordi is not (yet again) a well known famous rock band. In fact, yesterday is the first time in my life I heard this song and the band. So, I want to share you the reasons.

It was all start from the Eurovision Song Contest 2006. First of all, I am really not a big fan of any singing contest. Maybe I follow a bit on Idol, especially American Idol (from a biggest “my beloved wife” fan) and Norwegian Idol (salute for Wisnu Witono Adhi). Somehow, I got curious with this Eurovision contest since it was trying to perform different countries’ music and let the European public to vote for. They have a simple rule that they cannot vote for their own country’s performer. Thus, it has a meaning that we must appreciate (by vote) other countries. Such a wonderful rule of contest, I guess. In the year 2006, there are 24 participants. You may find the detail event in here.

Now, the main reason why I interested with this event is because the winner for this year contest is the band whose lyrics I have been posted. Lordi with his band and the song titled “Hard Rock Hallelujah” won the contest in a very unique way. The thing that I love from the band winning is that they are a “rock band”. As most of us know that it is very rare that rock music or band will participate in any song contests with televoting system. Most of the contests will be dominated by pop or ballads songs. Moreover, in such contest they commonly would be dress a very glamorous, sexy, and attracting in fashionable way. So, at the end we mostly will vote for the performer with obvious style and genre of music.

But, Lordi’s band has changed the obviousness. This rock band was really “rock” the Eurovision 2006 (I borrow part of the term from this headline). With their unique monster costumes and mask, as media said as a shock “horror rock” group, they won the vote from 35 European countries participated in the voting. The music, typical rock enough music (not that “hard” or “metal”) with fires on the stage were really gives different customary feeling on what a song contests should be considered. In short, they are really different. One of a kind!! (You can see their performance here)

Although political voting between neighbors’ countries voter may exists, but this year Eurovision – as stated by many commentator – was the best ever. I am absolutely agreed on that. There is a good lesson that I grasp from this year contest: the open-mindedness and heterogeneity. I quote what Lordi said to the press after win:

This is a victory for rock music, not only for Finland, but also for rock music. And also, it was a victory for open-mindedness. There are a lot of Eurovision fans that belongs to the minority. … We are the minority. But now, suddenly a hot rock band, looking like monster won a Eurovision. … The thing is that from now on Europe and the European people, they actually showed that the times changes and there are more different kind of musical style than just pop or ballads. Those are nice too, but this is also a prove that from now on I hope that there’s a band, more rock band who will have a courage to join in.

So, are you ready to vote for different kind of music?

Hard Rock Hallelujah

Hard Rock Hallelujah!
Hard Rock Hallelujah!

The saints are crippled
On this sinners’ night
Lost are the lambs with no guiding light

The walls come down like thunder
The rocks about to roll
It’s the Arockalypse
Now bare your soul

All we need is lightning
With power and might
Striking down the prophets of false
As the moon is rising
Give us the sign
Now let us rise up in awe

Rock ’n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
Demons and angels all in one have arrived
Rock ’n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
In God’s creation supernatural high

The true believers
Thou shall be saved
Brothers and sisters keep strong in the faith
On the day of Rockoning
It’s who dares, wins
You will see the jokers soon’ll be the new kings

All we need is lightning
With power and might
Striking down the prophets of false
As the moon is rising
Give us the sign
Now let us rise up in awe

Rock ’n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
Demons and angels all in one have arrived
Rock ’n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
In God’s creation supernatural high

Wings on my back
I got horns on my head
My fangs are sharp
And my eyes are red
Not quite an angel
Or the one that fell
Now choose to join us or go straight to Hell

Hard Rock Hallelujah!
Hard Rock Hallelujah!
Hard Rock Hallelujah!
Hard Rock Hallelujah!

Rock ’n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
Demons and angels all in one have arrived
Rock ’n roll angels bring thyn hard rock hallelujah
In God’s creation supernatural high

Hard Rock Hallelujah!

Music & lyrics: Mr Lordi
Arrangement: Lordi
Performer: Lordi

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Grunnlovsdag 17 Mai

Hari ini, Norwegia merayakan hari jadi-nya yang jatuh pada tanggal 17 Mei setiap tahunnya. Di kalender yang aku peroleh dari minimarket Rimi, tertulis "Grunnlovsdag" sebagai nama yang ditulis untuk merayakan hari tersebut, yang berarti Undang-Undang Dasar atau Constitution. Dan hari ini adalah hari libur nasional, di mana seluruh warga mulai dari anak-anak hingga warga imigran turut serta turun ke jalan berparade membawa bendera Norwegia dan bersuka-cita. Pada perayaan tahun ini, aku tidak turut merayakan karena alasan keengganan ditambah hawa dingin yang disertai hujan semenjak pagi. Namun, aku tetap menyaksikan keriuhan perayaan tersebut melalui televisi.

Tahun lalu, aku ikut merayakannya dengan berkumpul di tugu tempat di mana konstitusi Norwegia pertama kali dirumuskan oleh Christian Magnus Falsen (1782-1830). Oh ya, tugu tersebut berada tepat di belakang Tårnbygningen atau dikenal dengan nama Tower Building di kampus UMB. Jadi, dengan sedikit bangga aku mengatakan bahwa para "founding father"-nya Norwegia dahulu berkumpul di Ås dan merumuskan cikal bakal konstitusi Norwegia seperti sekarang ini.

Jadi, Gratulerer grunnlovsdagen og god 17 mai...

Monday, May 15, 2006

At last!!... But not yet finish...

At last!

All the files already burned into CD. Inside the CD, there are data management folder, including log file, do file and data file in Stata format; there are cover template in PDF files both for hardcopy-cover and CD-cover; there are the main thesis file... yes, it is my thesis!, including both MS-Word and PDF format. Why should I made all of those thing? Don't ask me, it was required by the university. According to regulation at UMB, I must submit my thesis print out with special-preserved cover and binding also with CD that include all data and necessary working file related with my thesis.

Therefore, all of them are ready now. Just need to print and binding (within a few hours) and submissioooooon!!!
[Note: the deadline for submission all of those stuff is May 15 2006 15.30pm].

But... Wait a minute!!
But, it's not yet finish!
Not at all!
I must defend it...

So help me God...

PS: I would like to show some important part from my acknowledgement of the thesis. "Specially, I appreciate Diahhadi Setyonaluri, my best friend and wife, for her love and continuous support. She is the one who patiently withstand the pain and stress during my absence while I was in Norway. I love you so much, my dear" (Wisana 2006: p.ii).

Saturday, May 13, 2006

pesan tentang 'Kesadaran'

Di tengah tenggat waktu yang sedang aku hadapi, aku bersyukur karena masih ada sedikit ruang untuk merenung sekaligus pembelajaran yang selalu aku temukan di dalam ajaran Sidharta Gautama atau yang lebih dikenal sebagai Buddha. Membaca Dhammapada selalu memberi inspirasi dan mengingatkan pentingnya kesadaran akan diri sendiri.
Check your mind,
Be on your guard,
Pull yourself out,
As an elephant from mud.

— xxiii.8
Terlebih, di tengah dunia yang semakin penuh dengan pengendalian oleh orang-orang yang berkuasa, tirani dan pemegang modal maka perdamaian dan kesejahteraan seperti yang selalu diagung-agungkan oleh berbagai peradaban dunia seakan semakin jauh dari kenyataan. Yang lebih memprihatinkan adalah betapa banyak agama yang telah turut serta - sadar maupun tidak - menjadi alat penguasaan. Pesan tersebut di atas, seakan menjadi relevan untuk diriku agar selalu mawas diri. Karena sangatlah mudah untuk kita terbawa arus 'panas' seperti saat ini. Hanya dengan menyadarkan diri sendiri lah, keseimbangan dan perdamaian hidup masih bisa dijaga.

Sehubungan dengan hal tersebut, hari ini umat Buddha merayakan hari raya Waisak. Aku menemukan dan membaca renungan yang ditulis oleh Biku Dharmavimala berjudul "Berjalan di Atas Bumi" yang telah membuatku ingat akan pesan Sidharta Gautama tentang 'Kesadaran'. Aku selalu menemukan tulisan dan renungan yang ditulis oleh para biku sangatlah religius dan mendamaikan, apabila dibandingkan oleh tokoh agama atau ulama lain di Indonesia. Secara apa yang aku pahami tidaklah cukup hanya diucapkan, maka aku tidak ingin mengumbar kesan apa yang aku pahami dan mengerti seperti khotbah dan pidato para pemimpin agama-agama besar tersebut. Cukup pesan-pesan sederhana ini datang di hari-hari seperti ini dan kubaca dengan seksama agar tetap bisa mengingatkanku akan kesadaran-ku.

Bagi segenap saudara/i umat Buddha, aku menghaturkan selamat merayakan Hari Waisak. Semoga segala kesadaran penuh damai dan cinta kasih akan selalu datang dari seluruh penjuru alam. Salam damai...

PS: Aku mendengar dan membaca kalau Buddha konon lahir di wilayah yang dikenal sebagai Nepal sekarang. Secara Buddha mengajarkan tentang kedamaian dan cinta kasih, namun ternyata di tempat kelahirannya saat ini perdamaian masih jauh dari kenyataan karena kemelut politik dan pemberontakan. Dengan ini, semoga Nepal bisa kembali damai dan membangun negaranya.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

untuk para pria

Judul artikel ini Mata Pria yang ditulis oleh Ariel Heryanto.

Silahkan baca, dan seraplah dengan pemahaman anda sendiri. Aku sudah menyerap dan memahami dengan caraku sendiri.

Monday, May 01, 2006

Selamat Jalan Pak Pram!

Ini bukan obituari, melainkan sekedar ungkapan rasa sedih bercampur haru-nostalgi akan berita kepergian seorang sastrawan sekaligus sejarawan terbaik Indonesia. Pramoedya Ananta Toer adalah salah satu penulis yang pertama kali membuat aku tidak mampu melepaskan buku saat aku membacanya.

Gadis Pantai adalah judul buku pertama karya Pak Pram yang aku beli sendiri di pameran buku Senayan. Aku habiskan membacanya dalam waktu 2 jam! Bahkan, setelah itu aku masih ingin membacanya lagi. Belum pernah aku sebegitu semangatnya membaca semua cerpen atau cerita. Tidak juga buku pertamaku, Petualangan Tintin ke Bulan, bisa membuatku seperti saat itu.

Sebelum membeli buku ini, aku hanya tahu dari diskusi-diskusi di kampus FEUI tentang Pak Pram dan kontribusinya bagi dunia sastra dan juga politik di Indonesia. Patut dicatat, sebelum tahun 1997/1998 karya-karya Pak Pram tidaklah dijual secara terbuka. Karena itulah, aku termasuk terlambat dalam mengenal dan membaca karya-karya Pak Pram.

Karya yang paling membuatku 'semadi' total (baca: mengurung diri) di kamarku adalah Tetralogi: Bumi Manusia, Anak Semua Bangsa, Rumah Kaca dan Jejak Langkah. Keempat buku ini aku beli bertahap dalam waktu dua minggu. Setelah keempatnya lengkap, barulah aku membacanya semua satu per satu selama dua hari di akhir pekan. Lagi-lagi aku tersentuh membaca keempat karya legendaris Pak Pram tersebut. Setelah itu, aku kerap menyempatkan membeli dan membaca beberapa karya Pak Pram yang tentunya semua sudah merupakan cetakan terbaru.

Kini, Pak Pram sudah pergi. Indonesia lagi kehilangan seorang tokoh besar. Pun tokoh ini adalah tokoh yang terlupakan dan terbuang oleh negaranya sendiri, padahal dunia mengakui pemikiran dan karya-karya besarnya.

Selamat jalan, Pak Pram! Terima kasih yang tulus dari seorang siswa biasa atas segala ajaran dan pemikiran besar tentang arti hidup dan berbangsa.

Friday, April 07, 2006

Universal - Humanism Law

Just finished reading the touching-quotations below... Need not to wonder "how similar we are" at all.

"Do not do to others what you would not like yourself. Then there will be no resentment against you, either in the family or in the state"
Analects 12:2

"Hurt not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful"
Udana-Varga 5,1

"All things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye so to them; for this is the law and the prophets"
Matthew 7:1

"This is the sum of duty; do naught onto others what you would not have them do unto you"
Mahabharata 5,1517

"No one of you is a believer until he desires for his brother that which he desires for himself"

"What is hateful to you, do not do to your fellowman. This is the entire Law; all the rest is commentary"
Talmud, Shabbat 3id

"Regard your neighbor’s gain as your gain, and your neighbor’s loss as your own loss"
Tai Shang Kan Yin P’ien

"That nature alone is good which refrains from doing another whatsoever is not good for itself"
Dadisten-I-dinik, 94,5

Thursday, March 30, 2006

the day of silence

Hari raya Nyepi, Tahun Baru Saka 1928, di tahun 2006 masehi ini mungkin terasa lain. Entah kenapa, di koran-koran internet yang aku baca belakangan ini, artikel dan berita tentang perayaan Nyepi terlalu banyak dibandingkan tahun-tahun lalu.

Entah kenapa juga, di tahun kedua aku di Norwegia, aku semakin menghayati arti me-nyepi lebih berbeda jika dibandingkan perayaan Nyepi di Indonesia. Secara aku tidak pernah sekali pun merayakan Nyepi seperti di Bali. Melainkan sejak hampir dua tahun lalu, aku merayakan Nyepi hampir setiap hari di Norwegia, di kota kecil Ås tepatnya, hingga hari ini.

Tiada kesan dan kata-kata yang cukup menggambarkan betapa berharganya pengalaman hidup di kota ini. Sebuah pembelajaran yang penting, sehingga membuatku tak henti bersyukur bahwa aku diberi kesempatan menekuni segenap alam di Ås khususnya dan Norwegia umumnya tahun ini. Sepi sungguh kota ini, namun sepi yang benar-benar menyentuh hati. Betapa pun sepinya tempat ini, aku berterima kasih dan bersyukur atas segala yang telah diberikan, ditunjukan, dan diajarkan oleh kota ini.

Terakhir, posting ini terinspirasi oleh Renungan Hari Raya Nyepi 2006 oleh Gede Prama di Kompas. Juga oleh editorial yang bagus oleh The Jakarta Post yang berjudul A guiet prayer. Juga sekalian aku ingin menghaturkan Selamat Hari Raya Nyepi, Tahun Baru Saka 1928.

"Damai tenteram semesta sekalian alam.
Semoga hati yang tulus dan pikiran yang jernih berkenan hadir dari segala penjuru ruang dan waktu"

Friday, March 17, 2006

polusi DAN konservasi

Aku masih percaya, dualitas di dunia akan selalu ada. Tidak mungkin satu sisi mendominasi secara mutlak atas satu sisi yang lain. Secara titik optimum dari suatu kehidupan adalah harmoni, maka mengelola dan - sedapat mungkin - mengendalikan dualitas tersebut adalah tujuan yang cukup sederhana dibandingkan berusaha sekeras mungkin melenyapkan sisi yang tidak kita inginkan. Misal, jika ingin membersihkan lingkungan maka bukan dengan sekeras usaha untuk meniadakan polusi melainkan mengelola dan mengendalikan polusi agar tidak berdampak lebih buruk pada lingkungan.

Silahkan membaca dan berkomentar atas posting-ku di kaFE depok, tentang harmoni lingkungan antara "berpolusi dan berkonservasi" dengan judul A query from 'not so green' Norway.

Pertanyaannya hingga detik ini yaitu bagaimana caranya menemukan keseimbangan tersebut?

Sunday, March 12, 2006

definisi demokrasi

Ingin tahu definisi 'demokrasi'? Ini dia:
"Lagi pula menurut Fauzan (Ketua Departemen Data dan Informasi MMI, red), jika yang digunakan adalah cara-cara demokrasi maka Bali sebagai pengusul minoritas harus mengikuti mayoritas. 'Ini kan sesuai dengan prinsip demokrasi bahwa suara terbanyak yang diikuti'"
Kutipan berita yang berjudul "MMI: Jika Terus Menolak, Jadikan Bali Daerah Khusus Pornografi", seakan mempertegas bahwa RUU APP adalah agenda besar kelompok mayoritas yang semakin tajam menancapkan kukunya di Indonesia.

Membicarakan moral sudah semakin menyebalkan... Ah, sekarang juga semakin menyebalkan membicarakan demokrasi.

Thursday, March 09, 2006

untuk orang-orang bermoral

Menurutku, opini berikut ini (Kompas, 9 Maret 2006) sangat bagus dan relevan. Sayangnya, opini semacam ini tidak akan didengar oleh orang-orang bermoral dan agamis di gedung DPR sana. Telinga mereka terlalu penuh mendengarkan doa-doa dan dogma untuk surga mereka nanti.

Apakah Kita Pasti Lebih Bermoral?

Kristi Poerwandari

Meski didesak pemerintah federal untuk membatalkan pelaksanaan hukuman cambuk, gubernur Negara Bagian Zamfara (Nigeria) tetap menghukum 180 kali cambuk terhadap Bariya Ibrahim Magazu, gadis remaja 17 tahun, karena melakukan hubungan seks di luar nikah.

Meski Bariya menjelaskan ia diperkosa tiga lelaki di desanya, pengadilan tetap menjatuhkan vonis. Berita (Kompas, 4/1/2001) itu memberi ilustrasi, atas nama moralitas, manusia dapat melakukan kekejaman dan tindakan tak bermoral terhadap manusia lain.

Kini, kita pembaca Kompas, berpendidikan, lelaki-perempuan, sebagian besar memiliki pekerjaan mapan, ibu rumah tangga yang hidup lurus dan biasa-biasa disuguhi berita-berita pro- kontra RUU Antipornografi dan Pornoaksi (APP), menyusul perda Kota Tangerang (No 8/2005) yang melarang pelacuran.

Saat membaca pro-kontra RUU APP dan perda Tangerang, mungkin kita berpikir, cara berpakaian orang harus diatur, sikap di muka umum harus diatur, karena tampilan orang-orang (perempuan) tertentu sudah keterlaluan. Berbaju minim, mempertontonkan bagian-bagian tubuh yang sensual, berpelukan di jalan. Kita berpikir diperlukan hukum guna menciptakan ketenteraman bermasyarakat dan mengurangi dekadensi moral. Caranya, mengatur orang-orang tidak bermoral itu (bukan kita).

Mengingat kita hidup baik-baik, jarang keluar malam, tidak tinggal di daerah kumuh atau lampu merah, bila keluar malam bisa berlindung dalam mobil yang nyaman dan tidak membuat orang curiga, kita menganggap aturan itu tidak ada relevansinya, sama sekali tidak akan merugikan kita.

Rupanya hidup kita lebih beruntung dibandingkan dengan banyak perempuan lain. Mungkin tak pernah terpikir perempuan harus banting tulang karena suami tidak (cukup) menafkahi, harus pulang malam karena bekerja, tak mampu membeli mobil, tak kuat membayar ongkos taksi, sehingga harus menunggu mikrolet di pinggir jalan.

Dalam dunia malam memang ada perempuan atau waria yang mencari uang dengan menjajakan tubuhnya. Ada banyak alasan psikologis, sosial, dan ekonomis yang menyebabkan orang masuk dunia pelacuran.

Pertanyaannya, pantaskah kita mengejar-ngejar mereka, menghukum dengan mempertontonkan dan mempermalukan dalam sidang terbuka, menertawakan, mengolok-olok, yang berarti menempatkan mereka sebagai makhluk hina? Ini belum bicara kemungkinan salah tangkap. Bagaimana bila karena suatu alasan kita menjadi korbannya?

Masyarakat terbelah

Beberapa tahun terakhir ini, masyarakat Indonesia terbelah dua: kelompok yang merasa lebih bermoral dan kelompok yang mengutamakan kebebasan individu. Bila dikotomi ini tidak ditanggulangi, dapat melahirkan perpecahan dan aneka masalah sosial lanjutan yang mengerikan.

Kelompok masyarakat yang merasa lebih bermoral memaksakan moralitasnya kepada masyarakat yang heterogen dan kompleks. Definisi yang digunakan sering naif, sempit, dan salah arah dalam memahami moralitas. Moralitas dipahami hanya pengaturan perilaku seksual, tuntutan bagi perempuan untuk membatasi diri, melayani, patuh, mampu membuktikan diri bersih.

Salah arah, mengingat moralitas tidak mungkin ditanggulangi dengan memberlakukan hukum formal, apalagi yang didefinisikan secara sempit dan bias. Salah arah, karena moralitas seperti ini mudah terpeleset menjadi mempersalahkan dan mengambinghitamkan korban. Bagaimana bisa membuktikan kita adalah korban pemerkosaan dalam masyarakat yang amat bias patriarkis? Salah arah, karena seksualitas manusia menjadi satu dari banyak hal terkait moralitas. Kekerasan, penyelewengan kekuasaan, kebohongan politik, korupsi, kolusi, nepotisme, ketidakmampuan mendengar jeritan orang kecil, semua itu adalah masalah moralitas. Salah arah, karena moralitas hanya dapat dibangun kembali melalui sarana-sarana yang melampaui hukum formal, dengan mengembangkan kepedulian, keterbukaan, penghormatan pada martabat manusia, dan nurani.

Mereka yang mengutamakan kebebasan individu juga bingung, bagaimana menyampaikan fakta untuk dapat dipahami para penyusun dan pelaksana peraturan betapa moralitas merupakan masalah yang kompleks. Dan yang perlu diatur serta dikenai sanksi bukan para pelaku, tetapi otak-otak dan sistem yang ada di balik jaringan dan organisasi yang menciptakan pornografi dan memperdagangkan perempuan dan anak. Kelompok ini dapat dituduh ditunggangi kapitalis dan penguasa pasar.


Mungkin ini disalahpahami masyarakat awam sebagai menyetujui pornografi. Padahal, banyak di antaranya justru melakukan pendampingan pada anak dan perempuan korban pornografi, perdagangan manusia, dan bentuk-bentuk kekerasan lain.

Memang fenomena sosial selalu amat kompleks, sulit dijabarkan dalam bahasa sederhana. Menjadi tantangan bagi kelompok ini untuk menyampaikan gagasan secara jelas dan sederhana sehingga dapat memperoleh dukungan sebanyak mungkin anggota masyarakat. Juga untuk dapat diterima dan dipahami pihak-pihak yang naif, moralistik dan legalistik, yang sedang di tampuk kekuasaan.

Mengerikan bila masyarakat Indonesia yang mengaku agamis melakukan pembenahan moral melalui pengambinghitaman, melekatkan stigma-stigma baru pada kelompok rentan, dan berperan seolah-olah menjadi Tuhan. Apakah kita benar-benar lebih bermoral dari mereka?

Kristi Poerwandari Ketua Program Kajian Wanita, Program Pascasarjana UI

quote of 5th March

My quote of the day, March 5th 2006, at Gardemoen International Airport, Oslo Norway to Alief
"Gosh, there are a lot of beautiful women in this airport. But, the most beautiful one for me is not yet arrive"
I said that words when I was waiting for my beloved moon from south, Ruri. And now she is already here with me, experience the beautiful snow of Norway but also suffered with extreme cold of (close to) North pole.

Velkommen til Norge, Ruri!

Sunday, March 05, 2006

perempuan paling sensual??

Namanya Caroline Ingrid Adita, atau dipanggil Aline. Menurut rubrik Urban di Kompas hari ini, ia adalah perempuan paling sensual menurut versi majalah For Him Magazine (FHM) dalam tajuk "The 100 Sexiest Women in the World 2005". Dengan kata lain, meminjam istilah justifikasi moralitas yang sedang santer dikumandangkan di Indonesia, Aline adalah perempuan yang masuk kategori paling "membangkitkan birahi" bagi kaum Adam. Anda setuju?

Tentang Aline sebagai perempuan paling sensual: Aku tidak setuju!

Alasannya: jika aku ikut ajang pemilihan tersebut, aku tak akan memilih Aline, bukan karena aku benci dia, atau apa. Bagiku, Keira Knightley adalah perempuan paling sensual di dunia saat ini. Untuk Indonesia, pilihanku jatuh pada Tamara Blezynski.
Anda juga punya pilihan sendiri, kan? Boleh saja anda setuju Aline terpilih. Tapi aku yakin, laki-laki lain punya pilihan mereka sendiri yang lain dari anda dan apalagi saya. Artinya, definisi dan kriteria sensualitas kita berbeda-beda kan? Iya kan?!

Tentang justifikasi kategori paling "membangkitkan birahi" bagi kaum Adam: Aku tidak setuju juga!

Alasannya: di atas sudah jelas, definisi dan kriteria sensualitas tiap spesies Adam berbeda-beda. Ada beberapa kesamaan, namun secara keseluruhan pasti berbeda. Definisi dan kriteriaku sangat spesifik yaitu keindahan kombinasi ekspresi wajah yang diperkuat oleh mata dan senyum. Soal kemolekan tubuh, bagiku yang penting proporsional. Sisanya adalah aura. Bagi anda? Aku tidak tahu, dan anda sangat boleh punya definisi dan kriteria sendiri. Ini hak manusiawi kan? Iya kan?!

Tapi yang terpenting, definisi dan kriteria tersebut sama sekali tidak membuat birahiku bangkit. Sama sekali tidak! Kenapa tidak? Lho, kenapa harus? Sama seperti misalnya saat kita melihat sebuah panorama pemandangan yang indah di kaki bukit. Apa yang dapat dirasakan? Hanya satu kata, "kagum". Baiklah, kagum dan terpesona. Dan, tidakkah itu wajar dan manusiawi jika kita melihat sebuah keindahan lalu kita kagum dan terpesona? Aku yakin, aku tak sendirian dalam hal ini. Apabila ada diantara kita ingin memiliki pun menguasai keindahan tersebut (karena hasrat, ketamakan dan nafsu), tidakkah itu juga wajar dan manusiawi. Namun, apabila ketamakan dan nafsu itu timbul, patutkah keindahan tersebut yang dihukum dan dikucilkan??! Jawabnya tidak sama sekali!

Semestinyalah kita belajar dan berlatih mengendalikan ketamakan dan nafsu tersebut agar tidak menguasai pikiran, perkataan dan perbuatan kita. Itu juga yang disebut manusiawi, kan?

Namun, ternyata kita tidak punya hak manusiawi sama sekali saat ini. Kenapa? Karena banyak pemimpin, ulama dan pejabat yang menganggap definisi dan kriteria 'sensualitas' mereka sama seperti semua spesies Adam di seluas permukaan bumi. Dan juga karena mereka-mereka ini tidak mau belajar dan tidak mampu berlatih mengendalikan ketamakan dan nafsu birahi mereka maka mereka tidak mampu menguasai pikiran, perkataan dan perbuatan mereka atas spesies Hawa (padahal mereka penguasa, ulama, orang suci, berakhlak!). Dan karena itulah sensualitas itu hanyalah satu definisi dan kriteria saja yaitu segala apa yang 'membangkitkan birahi'.

Jadi, ketika Aline mengatakan (dikutip dari artikel dimaksud)
”Aku hanya merasa seksi pada saat-saat tertentu saja sebenarnya....”
maka sesungguhnya bagi MUI, DPR pansus RUU APP, dan kelompok-kelompok suci lainnya, Aline (mungkin) terlihat seksi di segala saat. Atau malah ternyata mereka memilih Ainul Rokhima??

Benar-benar kedunguan yang datang dari langit! Dan aku ikut-ikutan dungu...

Friday, March 03, 2006

mengatur moral??!!

Silahkan membaca isi perda Tangerang, Banten di bawah ini (dikutip dari berita di sini):
”Setiap orang yang sikap atau perilakunya mencurigakan, sehingga menimbulkan suatu anggapan bahwa ia/mereka pelacur, dilarang berada di jalan-jalan umum, di lapangan-lapangan, di rumah penginapan, losmen, hotel, asrama, rumah penduduk/kontrakan, warung-warung kopi, tempat hiburan, gedung tempat tontonan, di sudut-sudut jalan atau di lorong-lorong jalan atau tempat lain di Daerah” (Pasal 4 Ayat 1 Perda No 8/2005).
Bingung, menggelikan, ingin marah, dan masih banyak lagi perasaan yang muncul ketika membaca pasal tersebut di tajuk kompas yang berjudul "Hati-hati minum di jalan, bisa ditangkap...". Ditambah lagi, membaca kisah para "korban" perda tersebut. Sementara Ape menulis secara lebih singkat dan padat lagi di sini. Dan komentarku atas ini yaitu peraturan tersebut bukan hanya sebuah tragedi melainkan sebuah bencana besar bagi kemanusiaan.

Bagaimana tidak demikian? Seluruh dunia juga tahu, Indonesia adalah negara paling korup di dunia (nomor 2 terbaik setelah Bangladesh). Padahal, orang Indonesia terkenal religius, taat beribadah, dan sebut saja segala macam indikator keimanan yang bisa diukur semua ada di orang Indonesia. Tapi, dengan demikian sudahkah orang Indonesia bermoral? Sementara itu kemudian segala tindak tanduk orang sekarang harus diatur agar tidak berbuat imoral dengan dirazia, ditangkap, didenda, dipenjara hanya karena kebetulan pulang malam dan berdiri di tengah gelap malam di pinggir jalan?? Dan semua aturan tersebut didasarkan pada "suatu anggapan"?!

Cobalah berpikir secara sederhana, tidak usah bawa-bawa moralitas dulu deh apalagi janji-janji surga dan keimanan yang tinggi. Apakah dengan menerapkan peraturan tersebut maka perilaku orang Indonesia akan lebih baik, lebih beriman, dan lebih soleh? Apa tujuan utama membuat peraturan ini? Ingin meng-gol-kan sebuah cita-cita politis tertentu? Ingin membuat negara dengan ideologi mereka sendiri?

Maaf jika aku terkesan emosi, tapi itu stigma dan pemikiran skeptis yang sekarang kerap muncul di kepalaku setiap kali membaca upaya-upaya semacam ini yang terus menerus digulirkan (silahkan baca posting opini lain di sini). Padahal ada masalah-masalah yang lebih mendasar yang patut mendapat perhatian lebih. Bimisal, kemiskinan dan korupsi di lingkungan sekitar yang terdekat. Sudahkah ibadah kalian membantu orang-orang miskin dan kesusahan itu? Dengan apa? Dengan mendoakan mereka agar segera terbebas dari kemiskinan?!

Atau, jika ingin menegakkan moral bangsa (apa pun itu ukurannya) cobalah berpikir kreatif dan holistik untuk menerapkannya. Bukan dengan cara-cara yang konyol dan membingungkan semacam ini - kalau belum bisa dibilang dungu, fanatik, dan hipokrit!

Apakah aku bilang kalian itu dungu, fanatik, dan hipokrit?! Iya, aku bilang demikian...

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Bush failure

A friend from Nepal asked me to googling a word "failure" and tell him what I found. Try please...

Well, the first result is titled Biography of President George W. Bush. Yes, he is the 43rd President of the United States of America.

Not so surprise ha...?
pinjamkan aku cinta
barang sejenak

agar tenang harap
sebelum binasa

lantunkan doa kebenaranmu
seantero bumi

agar kasih datang tercipta
sebelum syahdu jadi membara

severe snow this week

This situation actually already started from Sunday (26 February) and continue for the rest of the week, the weather forecast said. Aftenposten, one of the biggest newspaper in Norway, posted the news titled "Forget Your Car" and one line of the news mention about the forecast which said
"The Meteorological Institute predicted more snow on Wednesday - about 20 cms (8 inches) though less than the day before."

And Wednesday is today!! But yesterday (Tuesday, 29 February) was really even worse than today (Also read "Winter grip for the coming week"). During that time, I have to go to follo politidistrikt for getting new resident permit stamp with working permit, and then went to Vinterbro to buy something for cutting my hair and a special gift.

It's hard to describe in detail. However, this week is no doubt as one of the hardest life due to severe snow here in Norway, especially in Ås. As for student who have to walk (because our bicycle already hiden somewhere under the mountainous snow park) from the student house - Pentagon - to campus, and with this much of snow... argh!! It was so tired, you know!

Additionally, in this situation when I walked outside and looked like not so excited (of course I am not so happy!), some Norwegian I unintentionally chatted with on the way to campus always makes a joke with me by saying "Walking on the snow?" plus with big smile (something that very rare among not-very-closed Norwegian friend). And I interpreted that joke as "Why don’t you skiing now?", because they really like skiing and to do that they need quite a lot of snow. Oh I see… such an irony to make a joke for yourself especially in this kind of hard time, I guess.

What about the temperature? Don't ask, ok! I try not to know that exactly...

Saturday, February 25, 2006

keset kaFE Depok

Pernah lihat KESET di gedung-gedung di Jakarta kan? Terutama 'keset' dari bahan ijuk (atau sabut kelapa ya?) yang tebal dan biasanya diletakkan di pintu utama yang dari kaca atau di tangga luar menuju ke dalam gedung. Nah, apa yang tertulis di 'keset' tersebut? Ada dua bahasa di situ (biasanya bolak balik) yaitu "Welcome" dan "Selamat Datang".

Dengan pertanda 'keset' inilah anda sekalian dipersilahkan mengunjungi kaFE Depok yang baru saja mulai diluncurkan. Jadi, selamat datang dan welcome untuk membaca dan berdiskusi serta berkomentar.

Once again, Keset!!
sengaja ingin mengetuk pintu neraka
agar kenan segera masuk ke dalam megahnya

neraka yang mana?

terserah, siapa yang punya
karena merasa segalanya adalah Ia
dimana kapan saja hanya tampak Ia

semakin keras bekerja
ah, adakah itu gemilang?
Kemajuan hanya milik surga
yang tak akan pernah bisa dinyana

ingin mengetuk pintu neraka
agar kenan masuk ke dalam megahnya
yakinlah bisa abadi digjaya
dalam kegagalan dan nista

Friday, February 24, 2006

bukan cuma pajak

Lelah!! Berjalan kaki di jalan yang mulai becek dan dekil karena salju yang mencair sejauh tidak kurang dari tujuh kilometer. Untunglah langit cukup cerah dan suhu sudah plus tujuh, meski masih terasa menggigit lemak-kulit yang memang tipis karena angin yang sepoi-sepoi menghembus. Kenapa harus jalan kaki sejauh ini?

Jadi, itu adalah jarak antara Ski tog statsjon atawa train station menuju Follo likningskontor alias local tax assessment office untuk membuat skattekort atau tax deduction card. Perlu membuat skattekort tersebut agar hasil sedikit bekerja yang aku peroleh di Norwegia kelak bisa mendapatkan pengurangan pajak - syukur-syukur di kembalikan. Nah, jalan menuju likningskontor ini tidak dilalui oleh jalur bus dan tentunya tidak punya mobil. Karena itulah, jalan kaki adalah alternatif satu-satunya.

Sudah sejauh itu berjalan kaki (belum termasuk pulang balik), ternyata mereka tidak bisa memberikan skattenkort karena data mereka mengatakan resident permit-ku tidak mencakup working permit. Namun, mereka menyarankan untuk ke Follo Politidistrikt atau local police station di tempat tinggal terdekat (yaitu Ås) untuk mendapat stamp visa baru yang termasuk working permit tersebut. Memang itu saran yang solutif. Dan pulang balik lah dengan berjalan kaki lagi tidak kurang 7 kilometer di jalan yang mulai becek dan dekil karena salju yang mencair.

Di samping itu, ada yang menarik soal pajak ini. Di likningskontor tadi, terlihat bahwa kantor pelayanan-nya sangat sederhana dan dijaga oleh tidak lebih dari 5 petugas - yang tidak kebetulan semuanya perempuan (ini akan dibahas kelak, mungkin).

Di pintu ada permintaan untuk mematikan telpon genggam, ingat ya permintaan! Bukan perintah atau larangan. Karena tidak ada gambar telpon genggam dicoret atau bentuk larangan yang sifatnya mengancam melainkan isinya hanya kata-kata tanpa tanda seru. Entah kenapa, aku spontan mengikuti petunjuk tersebut (demikian juga seorang bapak tua yang datang setelah aku). Jadi ingat peraturan larangan merokok di Jakarta, yang diterapkan dan ditegakkan setengah hati. Ehm...

Lalu, di setiap sudut ruangan ada rak yang penuh dengan berbagai macam formulir terkait pajak dan buku manual cara pengisian masing-masing formulir dan semuanya dalam bahasa Norsk, sialnya (nanti kalau aku ke sana lagi akan kuambil untuk souvenir! Hehehehe...).

Kesederhanaan tersebut bisa jadi karena sistem pajak di Norwegia sudah terintegrasi mulai dari Norwegian personal identification atau Fødselsnummer hingga kantor pajak dan imigrasi serta perbankan melalui sarana internet dan sms. Iya, sms! Short messages service di telpon genggam! Makanya, para wajib pajak (baca: warga negara, baik tetap maupun sementara) tidak perlu bersusah payah antri atau ke kantor pajak untuk membayar pajak dan kantornya tidak perlu besar-besar pun megah.

Tunggu dulu, untuk kasusku perlu datang karena tidak mengetahui bahasa Norsk dan ingin mengetahui prosedur resminya maka datanglah untuk mendapat penjelasan.

Selain soal integrasi sistem, menurutku juga karena kesadaran pajaknya yang sudah tinggi. Jika si pengumpul pajak (baca: pemerintah) sudah berkomitmen kerja dan pelayanannya, maka si pembayar juga bersedia membayar pajak. Ditambah, sistem yang ada mampu memberikan berbagai alternatif pelayanan sehingga tidak "merepotkan" (baca: biaya transaksi yang relatif rendah dibanding pajak tinggi yang harus dibayar). Dan, tidak mengherankan juga karena sistem kesejahteraan sosial juga sangat baik dimana pajak adalah sumber pembiayaannya (selain minyak yang Norwegia miliki) maka seluruh sistemik yang berkaitan dengan baik tersebut menghasilkan sebuah kehidupan yang juga seimbang pun ideal.

Dengan kata lain, ini semua ternyata bukan cuma soal pajak semata...

Semua ini juga persoalan kesejahteraan; komitmen individu, komunitas dan institusi; perancangan sistem; tata cara menjalankan peraturan; aksi pelayanan; dan masih banyak lagi.

Kapan di Indonesia kita bisa berpikir dan bertindak secara lengkap seperti ini ya????

Thursday, February 23, 2006

excel divide

I had just completed my first day teaching assistant assignment on BUS230/231 Decision Modelling (Linear Programming or also known as Operation Research) for first year Development and Resource Economic (DRE) students and I found sentimental feeling as recalling my first time taking this same course last year.

In today first session, Dadhi (my partner) firstly explained about the algebraic form of a linear programming model of one exercise, then the second part of mine is to explain them how to transfer those algebraic form into spreadsheet model with Microsoft Excel and find the solutions.

After responding to several questions during our presentation, we found later that the basic problem still occurs for most of students as last year when we took the course. Among 20 students, I can say that only maximum 5 to 7 students whose Excel literates. The rest is quite far behind on understanding Excel formula or shortcuts or so on. We need to guide them one by one on their unique first ‘kisses with Excel.

Meanwhile, I already felt that most of students have problem already with math-algebraic part since there are not many good-math-student like usually. Note that I am one among the stupid-math-student last year even until now. But, this Excel stuff is more technical problem and gets to be quite annoying because it’s something that needs more ‘training’ than remembrance. Can I call this phenomenon as Excel Divide for them? I guess so…

Now I am wondering how is the situation of Indonesian students from far away places or remote areas, such as Kalimantan or Papua region, which perhaps have the same ‘literacy’ on computer like African friends?

I feel very lucky (thanks God!) that I lived and got study in capital city and being exposed enough with digital technology…

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

if you torture the data...

"If you torture the data enough, they will confess"

What?! Torturing data and they’ll confess?!

Gosh! Why they love econometrics so much? Yes, what I mean by ‘they’ are economists-wannabe and especially economists-wannabe from underdeveloped/developing countries. I have witnessed this back in my university in Indonesia before, but I realized that it also happen here in my university in Norway.

Friends, mostly from Africa and South Asia, are questioning me, "Why don't you take the STAT330?”(a.k.a Analysis of Categorical Data course) Please note that this course actually statistics course, but since many Development and Resource Economics master student take that course so it becomes some kind of the second compulsory econometric course for us and the teacher adapt the material and cases since then to fulfill our economics theory background. We already have 2 econometric courses in first and third semester, and the last semester we should write our thesis. But taking another course – in econometrics – seems not enough? Uh! Are you going to become econometrician or economist?

Well, my first reason not taking this course is because I have difficulties to learn more about this subject. What I mean is that I need to learn more basic things in econometrics, just like what I have got so far from the previous two courses. I really love the teacher, Kyrre Rickertsen, because he makes this stuff simpler and more fundamental instead of showing it as like the “devil” of derivations or formula (like my teacher in bachelor, Mr.HNP). Guess what, I start to love econometrics in some ways for sure. Unfortunately, Kyrre is looks like one of a kind. Another teacher (the one that give lecture on STAT330) does not proof me the same feeling as with Kyrre, by stating the above quotation in his first handout. So, that quote initiates my second reason for not taking more course on econometrics.

As far as my concern with data, my query is what kind of confession we will get? My mentor, Pak Jack (John W. Molyneaux), once said to be very careful in “utilizing” (not torturing!) data, especially survey data. There are several small but important factors we need to understand before we may ‘interrogates’ them to get confession. Not mention that these data have a lot of technical problems such as stack of questionnaires to read and piles of files with unique format to be merge. They may only consist of numbers and codes, but they will talk different if we question differently. Or if you use another secondary data, which is quite ready use like data from publication, how far we can explore them since there are so many problems may happen before we get the data on hand, e.g. data collection or tabulation-printing problem.

Anyway, the quote and friends question looks like to remind me to finalize the data for my thesis immediately. “Talking” with data seems very enjoyable instead of interrogating or even torturing them since they have so many stories and facts. But I also realized that they probably delude me as well certainly if I am stupid by trusting them too much. I hear they whisper… Alas, I don’t understand at all. They use binary language!!

And for econometrics?... Just like Def Leppard song titled "When love and hate collide"

Saturday, February 18, 2006

mencari sebuah puisi cinta

gelap malam tak pelak ingin segera kualihkan
menjadi indah fajar yang lembut nan menawan

siang tak ajar harus bisa kulewatkan
menjadi semu senja yang temaram menenangkan

dan segala ingin kuat meronta memekik
ingin segera dipenuhi
segala daya dan cara membara jadi api
membakar memacu semangat

hanya tetes rasa itu yang bisa menggenapi
secuil asa yang lalu tertitip didalam benak
rasa dan asa itu yang masih kau bawa

kini satu hanya inginku
menemui sang rasa dan asa
yang menyimpannya dengan kasih
menatap matanya dan mengetuk hatinya
agar sudi menemani segala ingin dan cita-cita

* setelah lama menatap sebingkai foto...
dan kangen berat!

tentang cinta dan puisi

Berikut adalah kutipanku yang kutemukan hari ini:

"Puisi akan selalu hadir ditengah-tengah cinta... meskipun ia datang tanpa secarik kertas berkata-kata atau kalimat berbunga pun pujian atau cercaan terhadap pujangganya melainkan dengan sang Hati sendiri"

unmeasurable love... just simple

Never too late than never... I just want to wish everybody happy 14th February of valentine's day with passion and love; whatever the pros and cons of it might be. May all heart and soul in every creature with pure hope and spirit on earth will have peace and enlight the world.

Speaking of creature, I am amaze with the story of Elephants Make a "Love Connection" from National Geographic. My favorit quote from this article is:
"But whether there's love in the wild heart is something that may never be measured"

If I may have one, I would like to have a pure love like the wild, "unmeasurable". No need rose or chocolate or fancy-expensive gift matter because that materials should not binding.

If you asked me how much I love you? I love you with my simple heart... just simple, only love.

*Photo: by National Geographic

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

situs kepresidenan atau situs seorang presiden?

Dr.H.Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono, demikian nama Presiden Indonesia yang ke-6 ini dicantumkan dalam web Presiden Republik Indonesia seperti dimuat beritanya di harian Kompas hari ini.

Secara umum, isinya cukup baik dan informatif. Desainnya juga sesuai, paling tidak pilihan warna dan latar belakangnya tidak norak atau nyeleneh. Meskipun tampak standar sekali dengan warna abu-abu sebagai dasarnya dan kurang menonjolkan sisi "Indonesia" sebagai sebuah sistem manajemen negara yang dikepalai oleh seorang presiden atau sebagai sebuah bangsa. Mungkin konservatif atau takut "terlalu berani" bereksperimen dengan kombinasi warna. Atau mungkin karena memang bukan itu tujuannya. Ah, ini cuma masalah selera lah.

Tapi yang agak mengganggu, IMHO, adalah ini sesungguhnya situs resmi kepresidenan atau situs resmi pribadi seorang presiden? Dengan biaya awal 84 juta rupiah (baca di sini), mustinya situs ini bisa diberdayakan untuk masa ke depan dan isinya bisa menjadi sarana informasi resmi pemerintah untuk masyarakat luas. Dan bukan hanya untuk mengedepankan kepribadian seorang presiden. Alasanya, sebab alamat situsnya menggunakan "nama" Presiden SBY. Bukan alamat tertentu yang spesifik mengacu ke kepresidenan-nya. Selain itu, di bagian atas halaman situs terpampang foto dan nama Bapak Presiden. Sementara berbekal pengamatan tersebut, aku berkesimpulan situs ini merupakan situs resmi pribadi seorang presiden.

Bila mana demikian, apa esensi dan manfaat penerbitan situs ini bagi Indonesia? Lho, aku tidak bermaksud untuk menentang penerbitan situs ini. Sama sekali tidak! Malahan sangat mendukung pemanfaatan media internet semacam ini. Namun, aku sangat menyayangkan jika situs ini hanya sekedar jadi corong pribadi presiden semata daripada untuk mendukung kinerja kepresidenan yang tampak sekali masih belum optimal mengatasi berbagai persoalan kebangsaan dan kenegaraan. Itu saja kok...

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

On European Demography

I've got an email and an interesting articles from a potential-but-beautiful demografer, and she ask these question: What is the best solution for Europe? Promoting large family? Or Promoting in-migration? Will Indonesia face this after the "demographic bonus"?

I will give her my opinion-answer soon, hope so.



After decades of ignorance, public awareness of demographic change in Europe is growing.

By 2050, every third German will be over 60 years old. That fact will affect the affluence and quality of life in Germany. And instead of high unemployment as a dominating theme, the discussion will instead become focused on labor shortages.

The problem essentially is the low birth rate -- German women have 1.3 children on average compared to 1.9 for the French. The reason is difficult to explain, says Francois Heran, director of the France's National Institute for Demographic Studies.

"The French birth rate is higher because of the continuity of 'family' politics and a series of complimentary measures by the government that affect daily life and education," she said. "I believe also, that the system of pre-school that we have certainly is an important factor in boosting the French birth rate -- 100 percent of children who are 3-years-old take part -- that is a world record. That isn't only childcare but also an element of education."

A new approach needed

In Germany, it has been long taboo to connect "family" politics with demographics, says Rudolf Herweck of the German Ministry for Family Affairs, Senior Citizens, Women and Youth. But since 2003, there has been a change in perspective, he adds.

"Our new 'politics' is that additional money is not sufficient to support families and that we need a three-pronged approach focusing on money, time and infrastructure," he said. "Money also means measures such as money for seniors, for children, tax deductions. Another point is time -- that employers should take measures to make the workplace more family-friendly. And finally we have changed our strategy, reaching out to other players in society because we can't make sustainable changes alone."

Employers must be involved

Employers have to be a partner, says Johannes Meier of the Bertelsmann Foundation.

"Employers must naturally realize, when they even half think about their long term interests, that our labor pool will dramatically change in the next twenty or thirty years," he said.

"They have to consider from where can we get qualified workers and how to guarantee that the skill level of employees is maintained. And that means very concretely that employers and local officials must take measures to reconcile work and family so that both parents can be gainfully employed. That is something normal in Scandinavian countries and in France and hopefully it will become something common for us, too."

Heran says that reforms in France tried to make it easier for working parents to return to work after having a child.

"When a woman in France has a child, she takes off work about one to three months, not three years," said Heran. "The French government also implemented a reform insuring that parents are compensated for their maternity leave but for a shorter time ensuring a more successful return to work."

Changing values

UN population expert Andres Vikat says that it will take a series of measures to affect a change in the birth rate. But he adds that part of the problem is a change in values.

"If a tradition model of a family, where the man works and the woman stays home with the children is seen as a hindrance to personal goals, then people are not going to do that," he said. "So if the state tries to promote that kind of model and go against the values of society, then even a large investment in measures promoting family is not going to have the desired results."

AuthorSabine Ripperger (jb)

© Deutsche Welle

Monday, February 13, 2006

when religion becomes sin

Interesting Editorial in The Jakarta Post, 13 February 2006. My best quote is "Moral goodness is in one's heart, proven through daily actions. It can never be simply founded in a book of laws which the insidious can interpret to justify the politics of the day"
The irony of democracy's cacophony is that the resulting liberty often gives birth to the freedom to be intolerant.

There can be no greater prejudice in this country than one based on religious chauvinism.

It is a case of the fervent few manipulating a passive majority.

These experiences teach us not to put stock in the false messengers of organized religion who excuse the lunacy of fanatics. Holiness is respect for all and the courage to stand up for helpless minorities.

Moral goodness is in one's heart, proven through daily actions. It can never be simply founded in a book of laws which the insidious can interpret to justify the politics of the day.

Imagine Bali adopting bylaws based on strict interpretations of the Hindu faith, or the Christian majority in Papua taking advantage of its special autonomy privileges to embrace Christian conservatism as a legal precept to regulate daily life.

No doubt Muslims throughout Indonesia would be up in arms.

Why then are our politicians acting so obliviously to the legal misnomers that have resulted in the unnecessary employment of shariah law by regional administrations? -- a practice which blatantly contravenes the 2004 Regional Autonomy Law.

Regencies and mayoralties such as Padang, West Sumatra, Cianjur, West Java, and Bulukumba, South Sulawesi, have issued bylaws implementing sharia. Conservatives in other regions are also making headway in their attempt to impose their religious views as law.

This development is, perhaps, a telling sign of the political elite's (lack of) commitment to the Constitutional vision of pluralism and equality before the law.

It is one thing if these people are true ideologues, but we fear they are mere opportunists instead -- those who would forward narrow-mindedness in society for the sake of short term political success.

They exploit society's longing for equality, justice and decorum by stoking religious fervor, all the while neglecting the fact that morality and justice have nothing to do with the application of religious laws per se.

Islamic values, and those of most major religions, are universal. It is already ingrained within the spirit of the 1945 Constitution, which includes respect for all irrespective of their faith (or lack of it).

We find no significant violation of the Islamic spirit in the laws of this land. On the contrary most actually reinforce the moral spirit of Islam.

That laws do not advocate public whippings, the amputation of a thief's hand or obligate public alms does not make national laws un-Islamic.

It is those who would coerce women to wear headscarves and deny them the right to be treated equally, who, we believe, are morally deficient.

By placing Islam as a focal point these regions are doing this great religion a disservice. It defies Islam's very egalitarian premise of purging discrimination.

Needlessly glorifying shariah law as a political object encumbers the religion with categorical outcomes when the end results fall short of the intent, as they often do.

It is the same as erroneously equating Islam with terrorism or the fact that a great many corruptors in this country proudly use religious titles before their name.

There's nothing wrong with the religion, it's the people who claim to be Muslims who are wrong!

The crux of the matter lies in our failure to recognize a distinct separation of religion from the state.

Indonesian society remains enamored by declarations of faith, while vilifying those who are morally cogent yet refuse to use their religion as political commerce.

In 1945 our forefathers made a visionary decision to uphold secular laws over ones which could potentially discriminate and split the fragile unity of this nation.

It is a cherished foresight, which a nation still vying for greatness should never lose sight of.

There can be no alternative now but for the highest judicial bodies of this land -- the Constitutional Court -- to strike down discriminative and religion-based regulations which local administrations have no authority to issue.

Articles 28D and 28I of the 1945 Constitution states that everyone should be free from discrimination and entitled to equal treatment before a just law.

Law No. 32/2004 on Regional Autonomy clearly stipulates that religious affairs are the realm of the central government. Article 28 of the law forbids regional administrations from taking decisions that discriminate against any citizen.

The core values of Islam are already alive and well in the hearts of all good Muslims. They need no boasting from politicians seeking to please an audience.

Failure to rectify these trespasses would be a moral, Constitutional and, dare we say, religious sin!

Saturday, February 11, 2006


embun durjana
diamuk amarah cerah pagi
tiada mengerti ingin mentari
sedang tak sabar memangkas hari

embun durjana
tersangkut di dahan siang
tak kering meski terpanggang
tetap lemah menanti asa datang

embun durjana
dihempas dingin angin malam
membara hangat tapi sepi tenggelam
menyisa harap namun ia tetap mengecam

embun durjana
bilakah segera jiwa mati?
tak kenan kan!
karna Tuhan juga bagai ikut benci
di gelap kuasa-Nya membatin hati
kaku sunyi

membela diri?
dijalaninya pidana semalam tadi
dan masih akan nanti...

* in Room T527 with GnA, my best fellow after "waiting" and then midnight pass-sad-by

A Tear and A Smile

by Kahlil Gibran

I would not exchange the sorrows of my heart
for the joys of the multitude.
And I would not have the tears that sadness makes
to flow from my every part turn into laughter.

I would that my life remain a tear and a smile.

A tear to purify my heart and give me understanding
of life's secrets and hidden things.
A smile to draw me nigh to the sons of my kind and
to be a symbol of my glorification of the gods.

A tear to unite me with those of broken heart;
a smile to be a sign of my joy in existence.

I would rather that I died in yearning and longing than
that I live weary and despairing.

I want the hunger for love and beauty to be in the
depths of my spirit,for I have seen those who are
satisfied the most wretched of people.
I have heard the sigh of those in yearning and longing,
and it is sweeter than the sweetest melody.

With evening's coming the flower folds her petals
and sleeps, embracingher longing.
At morning's approach she opens her lips to meet
the sun's kiss.

The life of a flower is longing and fulfilment.
A tear and a smile.

The waters of the sea become vapor and rise and come
together and area cloud.

And the cloud floats above the hills and valleys
until it meets the gentle breeze, then falls weeping
to the fields and joins with brooks and rivers to return
to the sea, its home.

The life of clouds is a parting and a meeting.
A tear and a smile.

And so does the spirit become separated from
the greater spirit to move in the world of matter
and pass as a cloud over the mountain of sorrow
and the plains of joy to meet the breeze of death
and return whence it came.

To the ocean of Love and Beauty----to God.

accu alias aki

Dari mana asal kata aki bermula disebut? Karena kata asli-nya adalah accu, yang asalnya dari bahasa Belanda. Kata lainnya adalah baterai, tapi kok kurang pas ya.

Kalau yang tipe kering mungkin boleh juga disebut baterai. Tapi rasanya tidak demikian dengan aki tipe satunya deh. Sebelumnya yang satunya itu disebut tipe basah, karena masih menggunakan cairan yang disebut air aki. Apa juga kata aslinya ya? Kenapa aku memusingkan asal katanya ya?

Accu alias aki ini komponen vital dari kendaraan jaman sekarang. Dan mempelajarinya juga tidak mudah, meskipun sudah dijelaskan sebagaimana sebuah tips di Otomotif agar dapat ditemukan yang cocok dengan kendaraan yang musti mengganti accu atau aki-nya.

Kenapa juga aku ngomongin accu alias aki ya? Bagai kedegilan yang menahun...

*sumber foto:

Sunday, February 05, 2006

"...i" dan ""

tak tahu apalagi yang bisa dihias
merenungi kenangan melas
masa kini meregang sensasi
terbawa dalam hingga mimpi

# puisi tak tuntas karena lepas
seperti hati yang getas

Wednesday, February 01, 2006


bagai sihirmu menyergap
tubuh dan jiwa
bahkan mengait menguntit
di kelahiran kembali

dilantunan senandung dawai
nada nelangsa di sudut reranting
nan kaku beku dihempas angin
terbawa hingga jauh
dan takkan terdengar
karena upaya segala
dikecup mesra hina

biar saja cinta
menangguk mimpi ria

# pa-dul = tanpa judul / GnA

di Tahun Anjing...

Gong Xi Fat Choi!
Congratulations and be prosperous!

Aku termasuk orang yang abu-abu kalau soal ramalan. Di satu sisi, aku tertarik dengan isinya bukan hanya yang baik-baik saja tapi juga yang buruk-buruk. Di sisi lain, aku tidak begitu percaya bahwa sesuatu - entah baik atau buruk - benar terjadi karena diramal. Artinya, aku lebih percaya semua itu jadi referensi. Jika dibilang baik, musti diwujudkan dengan kerja keras. Jika dibilang buruk, musti dihindarkan juga dengan kerja keras. Intinya, tetaplah kerja keras dan berdoa.

Di awal tahun Anjing ini, mungkin aku harus membuktikan kerja keras tersebut. Peruntungan shio-ku, shio Naga, kali ini cukup menyita perhatianku, sebagai berikut:

"Siklus shio Naga tahun ini mengalami tekanan yang sangat buruk dibandingkan shio lainnya, sebab Naga bertentangan (ciong) berat dengan shio Anjing. Oleh karena itu, kaum Naga harus bersikap hati-hati dalam mengambil keputusan penting. Dari sisi emosi, harus lebih sabar dan jangan mau terlibat konflik, baik dengan internal keluarga maupun lingkungan. Jangan melakukan kegiatan yang bersikap spekulatif di luar kemampuan, karena bisa mendatangkan kerugian dan kehancuran yang menyakitkan. Kondisi kesehatan dalam keadaan yang tidak selaras. Asal mau mundur selangkah, bahaya besar dapat terlewatkan"
(Peruntungan Shio di Tahun Anjing)

Ramalan tersebut (dan juga detailnya), seakan memastikan apa yang telah terjadi beberapa bulan terakhir dan bulan-bulan berikutnya ke depan. Sebulan terakhir ini aku banyak merenung selain sibuk dengan segala yang kini tak seperti sebelumnya. Dan segala tadi dan yang masih (akan) kukerjakan bagaikan menggarami laut.

Aku ingin mengatakan I will never be the same anymore...
Semoga kelak aku bisa berarti...